The dark and evil Woods Foundation

The play, The Crucible, was one of my favorite plays to teach because it dealt with two things that every kid was familiar with, gossip and slander. I would begin teaching this play by explaining how the worst thing to be called in the Puritan world of the 1600's was a witch. The Puritans had a tenuous hold on the new world and lived in a state of constant fear. They were fearful of being killed by the Indians, starving to death, dying of strange diseases, and most of all they were terrified of the ghost and witches who inhabited the strange and limitless forest. They lived in a world where witches could convert you and steal your soul for the devil. I would than explain that in the 1950's the worst thing you could be called was a communist. Communism was a real threat to America and a nuclear war seemed imminent. I explained to my class how people would practice nuclear bomb drills in school and millions of Americans built bomb shelters. I would than ask my class what is the worst thing you can be called today? ( I did this from 2001-2008) They all said the worst thing to be called was a terrorist! We would talk about how devastating this charge could be and how dangerous words are. Little did I know that the losing candidates in the 08 election would stoop so low as to label Obama a "friend" of a terrorist. So, for the purpose of looking at both sides, I decided that Obama is indeed someone who I should not trust because he served on a board with William Ayers, noted 60's terrorist. With my new found logic I will not trust anyone who served on any capacity with Ayers. So, because we must have intellectual integrity, here is how I see the world.
Obama, serving as an elected state senator, was on the board of the Woods foundation from 1999-2002. It is very important to look into the history of this devious group because we all know that noted terrorist, William Ayers, was serving on this board. The woods foundation had a stated goal of reducing poverty in Chicago and was founded by a noted REPUBLICAN AMBASSADOR under the great RONALD REAGAN! Oh my goodness! How come Hannity never told me this? On this nefarious board sat noted conservative businessman as well as democrats. This conspiracy was bipartisan! These traitors will stop at nothing to fool the American people! Sometimes the conspiracy's get so deep that I curl up in a ball crying and dream of Elizabeth Hasselback telling me it is all going to be O.K. I know what you are thinking, but Sarah Palin told me Obama was a bad man because he was on this board with a terrorist! How could good anyone not in bed with terrorist be on this board! If I was on this board I would throw acid in Ayers eyes and boil him alive while condemning him to hell. How could REPUBLICANS and a friend of the great Reagan be on this board with Obama and Ayers? If Obama "can't be trusted" because he was on this board than what does it say about all these Republicans and especially the founder? Oh, wait a second, Ayers never talked about his connection to the weatherman and was working as a professor of education because he was NEVER CONVICTED OF ANYTHING AND SEDVED NO TIME IN JAIL. But Obama should have know what this man did forty years ago when Obama was eight years old! Yes, my friends, Obama should have stuck a knife in his belly and screamed out, "I hate you dirty terrorist." You know what, my father was on the board of the Beach Cities Health District, I better find out who was on that board! I don't know if I can trust him!